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Episode 152: Counter-Hegemonic Armor: Building Joy in the Face of Racial Battle Fatigue with guest, Janet Stickmon
What happens when a doctor prescribes "having fun" as treatment for chest pain? For wellness coach and ethnic studies professor Janet Stickmon, this unexpected prescription became a turning point in understanding how joy functions as essential medicine—particularly for those experiencing racial battle fatigue.
Stickmon introduces us to the powerful concept of "counter-hegemonic armor," the protective skills marginalized people develop to navigate systems of oppression. But unlike traditional armor, which merely shields, this framework serves a dual purpose: protection and rejuvenation. "There's this beautiful duality," Stickmon explains. "There's being able to develop skills to properly take care of yourself... but also what is one doing to make sure they're nourished, filled, and rejuvenated—not just simply drained."
For coaches working with BIPOC clients, this perspective transforms practice. Traditional coaching approaches often dive straight into self-care without acknowledging systemic factors. Through her program Center Joy PWR, Stickmon creates space where professionals of color can heal racial battle fatigue while reconnecting with joy. She shares her personal journey—how simply naming her experience as racial battle fatigue provided immediate liberation, and how that doctor's unusual prescription revealed she'd lost connection with fun altogether.
The most actionable takeaway? "Treat joy as if it were a daily vitamin that you have to take," Stickmon advises. This isn't about waiting for happiness to happen but consciously integrating joy rituals into daily life. For coaches from privileged backgrounds, she emphasizes cultural humility over cultural competency—ongoing self-reflection about biases rather than presumed expertise.
Whether you're experiencing racial battle fatigue yourself, supporting clients who are, or simply seeking a more balanced approach to personal wellness, Stickmon's framework offers both practical tools and profound insights. Listen now to discover how protecting yourself can also help you thrive—and why abundance means having "the amount of health, wealth and love that you require to live a joyful life."
Watch the full interview by clicking here.
Find the full article here.
Learn more about Janet here.
Janet is offering choice readers and listeners 60% off her CenterJoyPWR®: Strategies for Healing Racial Battle Fatigue which is an online experience designed for professionals of color who want to heal their racial battel fatigue and center joy in their personal and professional lives. Use code: choice
Offer is only good until September 1, 2025
Grab your free issue of choice Magazine here - https://choice-online.com/
Welcome to Beyond the Page, the official podcast of choice, the magazine of professional coaching, where we bring you amazing insights and in-depth features that you just won't find anywhere else. I'm your host, Garry Schleifer, and I'm excited to expand your learning as we dive into the latest articles, have a chat with this brilliant author who wrote it, thank you Janet, and uncover the learnings that are transforming the coaching world. When you have a chance, join our vibrant community of coaching professionals as we explore groundbreaking ideas, share expert tips and techniques and make a real difference in our clients' lives. Remember, this is your go-to resource for all things coaching.
Garry Schleifer:In the meantime, let's dive into this episode. In today's episode, I'm speaking with wellness coach, Janet Stickmon, who is the author of an article in our latest issue, Coaching, Anti-Racism and the Backlash Against DEI. Her article is entitled Molding Counter-Hegemonic Armor ~ The first step on the path to joy and liberation. A little bit about Janet. As I said, she's a wellness coach and a consultant, Professor of Ethnic Studies and author of Crushing Soft Rubies, a memoir: Midnight Peaches; Two O'Clock Patience, a collection of poems, short stories and essays on womanhood and the spirit; and To Black Parents Visiting Earth ~ Raising Black Children in the 21st Century. Awesome. She's the founder of Center Joy PWR Strategies for Healing Racial Battle Fatigue, an online experience for professionals of color who want to heal their racial battle fatigue and center joy in their personal and professional lives. Janet, thank so much for joining me today.
Janet Stickmon:Thank you so much, Garry, for having me.
Garry Schleifer:Normally I ask why your wrote the article, but with your background, it just made so much sense. It must have been this megaphone calling you saying Hey, Janet, choice wants you over here to write about all this counterhegemonic conversation that you've learned and you're working with.
Garry Schleifer:But tell us more about this hegemony.
Janet Stickmon:Well, yeah, I've been writing and thinking about counter-hegemonic work and racial battle fatigue for quite a while. I decided to write this article because I wanted to make sure that within the context of coaching, whether it be life coaching, wellness coaching, executive coaching, that when working with clients of color, that there's a recognition that there are systems of oppression at work that interfere with one's ability to simply engage in self-care. Often, at times, within various circles that want to address self-care there is an elimination of that aspect of systems of oppression. They dive right into the self-care which can be fine for most folks, but other folks are like you know what? This isn't as easy as just simply zeroing in on the work that I need to do as an individual. There's also this other factor when it comes to the workplace. What can workplaces do to ensure that their environments are psychologically safe for clients, for people of color, but also people of other marginalized groups?
Janet Stickmon:And so, yeah, you know, about five years ago I launched Center Joy Power, and at that time its original name was Soul Care Power, and then I changed the name. But I wanted to make sure that I created a space for professionals of color that were trying to heal their racial battle fatigue and also try to figure out how they can tap back into what brings them joy. And so that's, I think, where the work began, at least creating space for others. My personal work started several years before that in terms of realizing that I was experiencing racial battle fatigue, figuring out that there was a name for what I was experiencing. I think that was the big thing. There was something really freeing about learning that there was a name for you know, what I was experiencing mentally and physically, and I can always go into that later on.
Garry Schleifer:Yeah. Well, I think you know we're all glad you did, by the way, because we wouldn't have this great article to tell us all what this all means. Speaking of what this means, I think we kind of uh need to go back and I'm going to read here. I have worked on this word.
Garry Schleifer:Let me tell you.
Janet Stickmon:No, no, no worries at all.
Garry Schleifer:Hegemony is the system of dominant norms, practices, values, ethics and beliefs that reinforce the supremacy of and serve to privilege and benefit certain groups. Example, me, white male, upper middle class, Christian, heterosexual. OK, well, we don't get all of them, that's not me. Cisgender, able bodied, while marginizing other groups, and so counter hegemony is basically the shield, as you put it, the armor that is needed or built, or may be seen or not seen, to protect you from racism and oppression. Is that? Do I have that right? Would you like to add to that?
Janet Stickmon:Sure, no, no, that's, that's perfect. Yeah, I really think of the counter-hegemonic armor that we have to create as people of color if we want to navigate this world that has these multiple systems of oppression, overlaying, intersecting. It's this, I hesitate to just simply say armor, that we have to build an armor because there's a certain callousness that suggests and though most certainly we cannot be naive. We have to be able to protect ourselves, be able to defend, stand up for ourselves and defend our self-dignity but while doing so, it is important to make sure we feed ourselves all the things that bring us joy, that there is a certain softness to what it is that we engage in, so that we can sustain ourselves and feel alive, and feel as though we're glowing as we navigate this world where, you know, we will have to address the various blows that come with the different microaggressions, whether they are related to race, gender, class, sexuality, ability, etc.
Garry Schleifer:Wow.
Garry Schleifer:I'm wondering for myself. So I'm one of those, as I, you know, jokingly, but truthfully said, I'm a white man of privilege. I know that. Well, what advice would you have for me, or guys like me or people like me, to recognize the impact we're having? Or that there's armor between me and the person I'm coaching and might be BIPOC.
Janet Stickmon:I think that it is important to add to whatever work you've already done with regards to awareness about any unconscious or conscious biases, as it relates to race, gender, class, et cetera, and, as those rise to the level of consciousness, be able to then simply address what kind of impact that may have on the things we may say or do.
Janet Stickmon:And you know, of course, this is something that happens over a lifetime, you know, with self-reflection.
Janet Stickmon:But I think that that really is the first step and, as that awareness is developing, there's a fine tuning of the level of care that one can provide for their client. And I think you know the work most certainly can be done. You know there are a number of allies within the different social categories that would be considered dominant within this country and throughout this world, that really have put in the work to be conscious of those biases, because they know that if they don't, that there can be an inadvertent way in which those biases can then cause harm to the person that they're working with. And you know, oftentimes the last thing that they want to do is cause harm so that they're going to end up doing the work. Those who are really committed, they'll do the work and be like, okay, you know what, and have a certain level of of humility and I think that's the beautiful thing that I've witnessed amongst white allies and other allies that are within dominant groups that do this kind of work.
Garry Schleifer:Yeah, thank you for saying that. It's a continuous learning, obviously, and another one of our authors said, it's not about cultural competency, it's about cultural humility. To your point right, it's just always being aware that I don't know sometimes if I've said something that'll offend someone, and I always say if I do, please let me know. It's not my intention ever to do that, and I'm a learning human being, learning growing being so. I'm like that too. You know, something else came up for me, and is having the armor, like we were talking earlier about the counter homogenic armor. Is it something that you help your clients build, or you help your clients dissolve, or like does it go away? Is it something you want to go away?
Janet Stickmon:Yeah, that's a that's a great question. I think it's something that I help clients build. And you know, the interesting part is and I'll back up a bit. When I first started toying around with this idea of counter hegemonic armor, it wasn't even in the coaching context, it was within, you know, parenting and as a mom, me being a biracial woman of Black and Filipino descent, my daughter being multiracial, four different backgrounds and it became really important to make sure that she had all the tools to speak up for herself when, for instance, somebody touched her hair and thought she was cute and touched her hair, we need to give her that language and at the same time also make sure that she never felt like she had to shrink anywhere, that she could continuously live and bloom and thrive and all those sorts of things. And so, when thinking about it then within this context of coaching, you know, when I developed the different healing frameworks for racial battle fatigue, initially I did not talk about strictly the idea of molding counter-hegemonic armor. It really kind of evolved through the course of different talks. I'm like you know what. What I'm doing basically is that. And so to your question, I don't see it as something to dissolve but something to develop, because, again, there's this beautiful duality to creating this counter-hegemonic armor. There's the, again, being able to develop a certain set of skills so you can properly take care of yourself.
Janet Stickmon:Let's say, for example, being able to set boundaries. When you're trying to name the racial battle fatigue in your life, what are the stressors? Where is ultimately that source of pain, that source of stress, chronic stress, and really explore the possibilities of how one can distance themselves from some of those stressors so that they can have the time and space to be like, oh wait, this is what's been happening. Why is it that now, all of a sudden, I can sleep because I've zeroed in on that thing that was really keeping me up at night. I see it as something to develop and within this overarching journey of developing one's counter hegemonic armor there's the necessity of joy. T hat's really the central part. How important it is to see a conscious integration of joy in one's life as essential.
Garry Schleifer:So what I'm hearing is that counter-hegemonic armor in a sense is not just a protective thing, it's also an awareness. It's like a place to say oh, there's this between me and that person, or me and that group, or that group and me.
Janet Stickmon:So the armor is really, for the client of color, it has a protective aspect, but also a rejuvenating aspect. The real central part is the what is one doing to make sure that they're nourished, make sure that they're filled, make sure that they're rejuvenated and not just simply drained, and so that becomes the real key aspect, while also recognizing, hey, there are these forces at work that have had their impact, their cumulative impact on my health, mental and physical and behavioral, that I do need to address. But as I address that, I am, there's a certain release. As I'm naming it, as I'm addressing it, I'm like, okay, this isn't going to have this stranglehold on me all day, all night, for the rest of my life, because there's a certain level of freedom and liberation that's available to me. And where is it and how can I have access to it?
Garry Schleifer:Well, thank you for that. Yeah, very much. You mentioned a couple of things, so I'll let you choose the direction, okay.
Garry Schleifer:Framework or centering joy.
Janet Stickmon:I'll talk about centering joy.
Garry Schleifer:There we go, so tell us more about that. What is this practice of centering joy that's available?
Janet Stickmon:Sure, I see the practice of centering joy as having two components, two main components. One, the basics of self-care, healthy eating, good sleep, physical activity, good hydration, okay and then a second component, having to do with seeing joy as a vitamin, as a daily vitamin that one can consciously take. So joy vitamin, joy ritual, that one can consciously integrate into their daily life and not just simply wait for happy, fun things to fall into one's lap and then be like, oh yeah, I'm having a great time, but really take control and say, you know what, this thing that I normally take great joy in, I haven't done it in a while. Let's bring that back into my life and then really take a look at how it makes you feel and so, this is something that I absolutely love about the process of centering joy in one's life. That it really it involves this conscious integration of joy as if it were a vitamin. And the source of this idea really was my primary care doctor, I'd say around 2016, though he didn't use it in those terms. I remember having to go to the ER.
Janet Stickmon:I was having chest pains, heart palpitations, a lot of stressful things going on at the time and went to the ER. They checked me in right away, took all these different tests and luckily, all the tests came out good. Everything was fine. And the doctor came and I remember, sitting on the edge of the bed, the doctor came, told me, you know he said all the results came out good. And I was happy that they came out good and I told him that, listen, doctor, I'm glad that everything came out the way it was supposed to. But you know, what do you attribute the chest pain to? Because I know that wasn't in my head. And he looked at me and he said so, how's work? And I burst into tears, Garry, I burst into tears. And he just, he just nodded, and he and I both knew in that moment what the reason was. I don't think it was 100% clear to me until that moment.
Janet Stickmon:And that particular doctor then hooked me up with a new primary care doctor and we had a conversation a couple of days later and it was very, very nice, very casual. You know he's asking me about work, my personal life, my family, and then he asked me, he said, Janet, what do you do for fun? And I said I had to think about that one. And you know, and it was weird because I didn't recognize myself when he asked me that question, cause I thought, you know I'm a fun person, I do fun things, I'm always fun. When he asked me explicitly, what do you do for fun, I did not have an answer. I did not have an answer, and that was another realization. And he said to me, he said, Janet, what I want you to do your homework for this week.
Garry Schleifer:Your homework. It sounds like a coach session.
Janet Stickmon:And he said your homework for this week is to to have fun, and I never in my life had a doctor prescribed fun for me.
Garry Schleifer:Yeah, or is that insightful, both of them, the ER doctor and the primary.
Janet Stickmon:Yes, both of them. You know they were so insightful, you know, and I love the fact they weren't so quick to just give me a pill and send me out the door. They're like, okay. No, we know that there's some other factors that are at work here and we've seen this before, and I am forever grateful to the primary care doctor for prescribing fun for me and it really made me think differently about my relationship to fun, my relationship to leisure, and you know and I must say, you know, to his credit he didn't just prescribe fun, he made sure I was connected with a therapist, he made sure I was had these resources and made sure that there was a whole network of things that I was addressing.
Garry Schleifer:He didn't trust you're going to go have fun.
Janet Stickmon:I know, I know, yeah.
Janet Stickmon:He had those other things on deck to to be my safety net.
Garry Schleifer:There we go. Good on him.
Janet Stickmon:You know it was funny is when I reconnected to the things that I knew brought me joy, I noticed that I would put a hundred percent into it. The ambition that I had when it came to work, that was the kind of ambition I had when charged with the task of going out and having fun. I remember my daughter was in, she was, I think, in a soccer class at the Y and the parents decided to have a little, you know, fun game right before hand with the kids. But I what folks always have to remind adults when we're working with kids don't go a hundred percent, you know, just go 50%, 60%. Well, you know, I think I went around eighty, ninety percent, and I wasn't the only parent, all of those parents. Oh sure, we're gonna get these kids, you know, and I messed up my elbow that time, you know, trying to have fun and so it was a good reminder.
Janet Stickmon:And years later I saw some of this in some work of colleagues, you know, just the idea of making sure that we don't replicate the kinds of attitudes that we have that we've developed within a work context. We don't replicate those sorts of things when we're trying to embrace joy, the fun, play, leisure. We don't have to go hard. This is the time to chill.
Garry Schleifer:That's the word that's coming to mind.
Janet Stickmon:Yeah, just let allow things to be, and I think oftentimes that can be one of the hardest things to do, because we're, you know, we're good at it, we're good at accomplishing the goal, and you know, and that's important that has been an important set of skills to develop that has got us this far. The key thing is knowing when to dial it back a little bit and then add another set of tools that speak to initiating the relaxation response in our system so we're not always up here, that we can always be here. This bring things down to a level of homeostasis, some balance between our sympathetic and our sympathetic nervous systems.
Garry Schleifer:Oh good point.
Garry Schleifer:How are you doing on keeping joy and fun alive in your life? You seem very light, joyful already, so you're obviously doing something or you're good at faking it.
Janet Stickmon:No, I'm just a little bit of both. I mean, thank you. I really appreciate that. I have been investing a lot of time and energy in staying well. I think over the last, I'd say the last few months, I've been able to return to a workout routine that feels good. I've always been physically active. I'm a swimmer. I have done Muay Thai, I've done Kali, I've done all these different things, and Bikram yoga, but then a couple of years ago I tore my plantar fascia in my right foot while doing parkour and that took a while to to heal. And as I was recovering, I was remaining active but in ways that did not cause me to reinjure myself. But around last October, I returned to parkour, same coach and I also started working with a personal trainer because I didn't feel like I could do, I could restore my set of skills and my health and all these sorts of things. I didn't feel like I could do it alone. I think what I noticed when I tried to do it on my own is that I was too hard on myself.
Garry Schleifer:Going 80, 90, a hundred percent again.
Janet Stickmon:Exactly, you know, you know, and I, I noticed, you know, there was some self-talk there that was, you know, that was not helpful self-talk. I would never be so harsh with the clients. I work with the students, I work with my friends and family, and yet the unconscious language I was using to motivate myself was so unhelpful. And so I knew that I could lean on, you know, these particular coaches to give me the guidance, just enough guidance. I'm not big on the rah rah, you can do it, I don't need that. But you know, I needed the well-informed guidance on how I can get from A to B and be physically well as a bare minimum, but also feel alive. And that's one of the things that I love about returning to parkour and then doing the resistance training with the personal trainer. So I think that has been a foundation.
Janet Stickmon:What else do I do for fun? Oh, I paint miniatures. I love painting miniatures. That started also during the pandemic. There's a certain surrender that I feel when painting miniatures, but it also allows me to be creative, and so it's fascinating because I make sure that I take care of myself, that somehow then radiates when I'm working with my clients. Because you know, what would my words be worth if I'm telling them, hey, you know, go but I'm sitting here being miserable and you can hear the misery through my voice, nobody's will be convinced.
Garry Schleifer:They can smell in authenticity, those humans. I could talk about this all day, especially the joy part. So thank you for bringing that into the conversation and going from you know it could have been a dark place to a very supportive and and informative environment so thank you very much
Janet Stickmon:Yeah, thank you.
Garry Schleifer:What would you like our audience to do as a result of the article in this conversation other than find joy and have fun, obviously?
Janet Stickmon:It's so fun, because I mean truly that is the main thing that I would like folks, I would like that to be the main takeaway. I can get a get into a little bit about the how, because sometimes when we say, you know, go out and have fun, sometimes people think, oh okay, I know how to do that.
Janet Stickmon:I think that, yeah, the main thing that I'd love folks to take away from this is to treat joy as if it were daily vitamin that you have to take. That it's essential to restoring your health and wellbeing and to feeling, you know, completely alive and well. And when doing so, you know, take time to just sit quietly with oneself and meditate on what is it that brings me joy, and allow those questions, allow those answers to bubble up, whether it's in the form of images, words, sensations. What comes up when we ask ourselves that question and, as the answers come forth, just zero in on one and say you know what, that's what I'm going to do once a day, that's what I'm going to do once a week, and have a certain lightness to that. So that's one thing I would like people to take away.
Janet Stickmon:One more. In my work I talk about what it means to to heal but also move beyond healing. And you know, I think of, you know, this continuing path beyond healing involving abundance and developing an abundance mindset. And I know that that word gets, you know, tossed around quite a bit and can have a variety of meanings, but one working definition that I use when it comes to abundance is from the work of Dr Mario Martinez, the Mind Body Code, and he defines it as the amount of health, wealth and love that you require to live a joyful life, a wellness life. And if that's something that folks can hold on to, this idea of abundance being that. What's the amount of health, wealth and love you require to live a joyful life, and then again allow those responses to come forth and then move forward with what comes forth, I think that that can put all of us on the right track in terms of being well and being in community with each other.
Garry Schleifer:Yeah, oh wow, thank you, yeah, and I'm glad that you brought that up because and said it twice. I love that saying about what to look for and to measure, and to know and to feel and all that.
Garry Schleifer:So thank you so much.
Janet Stickmon:Oh yeah, my pleasure, my pleasure. Thank you for having me, Garry. This was so fun.
Garry Schleifer:Yeah, yeah. Well, thanks for writing for us and being here. What's the best way to reach you, Janet?
Janet Stickmon:Folks can reach me either. They can find me on my website, www. janet stickmon. com, or on social media Instagram, Facebook, LinkedIn at Janet Stickmon across all platforms.
Garry Schleifer:And that's Stickmon with an M-O-N.
Janet Stickmon:That's correct.
Garry Schleifer:Yes, she's not a stick man, she's a stick woman. No, that didn't work either. Oh well, we'll get the point across.
Janet Stickmon:That's okay. Yeah, Stickman M-O-N.
Garry Schleifer:Yeah, thank you so much for joining us for this.
Janet Stickmon:Okay, thank you. Thank you, Garry. Have a wonderful day.
Garry Schleifer:That's it for this episode of Beyond the Page. For more episodes, subscribe via your favorite podcast app, the one that most likely brought you here. If you're not a subscriber to choice Magazine, you can sign up for free by clicking the QR code in the top right-hand corner. If you're not watching and you're listening, go to choice-online. com and click the Sign Up Now button. I'm Garry Schleifer. Enjoy the journey of mastery. Thanks again, Janet.
Janet Stickmon:All right, thank you so much, Garry. Bye.