Episode 151: Coaching For Joy with guest, Cindy Van Eeckhout

Success can be the very thing that steals your joy, not because you’re doing it wrong, but because the world rewards results while quietly ignoring the cost. I sit down with coach and speaker Cindy Van Eeckhout, author of “Helping Clients Find Joy in a High Pressure World,” to unpack what “misaligned success” really looks like when your life shines on paper but feels heavy inside. We get honest about how high achievers minimize emotions to stay productive, how that builds disconnection from values and needs, and why joy is often the first thing sacrificed in the name of performance. 

We also draw a sharp line between happiness and joy. Happiness tends to be an emotional reaction to external events, while joy is intrinsic, a steadier internal yes to life. That difference matters for coaching, leadership, and entrepreneurship because joy functions like renewable energy: it supports clearer decisions, healthier boundaries, and better leadership under pressure. Cindy names the common warning signs high-achieving women face, including mental overload, emotional suppression, physical depletion, and spiritual misalignment, and explains how alignment can change over time as you evolve. 

From there, we get practical with Cindy’s Joy of Life Method, a five-pillar framework built around clarity, energy management, working smarter, mindset, and purpose. You’ll hear specific ideas like a simple morning ritual using breathing, meditation, movement, gratitude, and intention setting, plus why celebrating small wins can instantly shift your state when your mind is stuck on what isn’t working. Cindy also shares a free Joy of Life assessment to help you pinpoint what’s driving stress and overwhelm. Subscribe, share this with a high achiever who needs a reset, and leave a review with your biggest takeaway.

Watch the full interview by clicking here. 

Find the full article here.

Learn more about Cindy here. 

Free gift: The Joy of Life Assessment
A free 2-minute assessment that helps high-achieving women identify what’s driving their stress, overwhelm and exhaustion - and receive personalized insights and practical tips to regain clarity, energy and joy without sacrificing success.

Grab your free issue of choice Magazine here - https://choice-online.com/

Transcript

Welcome And Guest Setup

Garry Schleifer 0:08

Welcome to Beyond the Page, the official podcast of choice, the magazine of professional coaching, where we bring you amazing insights and in-depth features you just won't find anywhere else. I'm your host, Garry Schleifer, and I'm excited to expand your learning as we dive into the latest article, have a chat with this brilliant author that way, and uncover the learnings that are transforming the coaching world. When you have a chance, join our vibrant community of coaching professionals as we explore groundbreaking ideas, share expert tips and techniques, and make a real difference in our clients' lives, because that's what we love to do. And in the meantime, we make some difference in our own lives. Remember, this is your good go-to resource for all things coaching. But for now, let's dive in. In today's podcast, I'm speaking with coach and speaker Cindy Van Eeckhout, who is the author of an article in our latest issue, Coaching to Unlock Joy. Her article is entitled Helping Clients Find Joy in a High Pressure World: Coaching the Path to Sustainable Energy, Clarity and Alignment, which you'll find out is one of her favorite topics. A little bit about Cindy. She's the founder and CEO of Alegria Coaching, creator of the Joy of Life Method and Business, and Joy of Life coach, speaker, and podcast guest. She has a master's degree in business engineering, eight years in corporate leadership, and more than two decades of entrepreneurial experience, including co-founding for successful heart-led businesses in Provence, where she lives with her husband. She empowers high achieving women to reclaim to reclaim their time, energy, and joy without sacrificing success. Through a blend of business strategy, mindset, and well-being, Cindy helps her clients work smarter, live freer, and thrive with purpose and let's wait for it, joy. So no surprise you wrote for us. Thank you for being here and joining me Cindy.

Cindy Van Eeckhout 2:12

Thank you. Thank you for having me, Garry. I am really looking forward to this joyful conversation, I think.

Garry Schleifer 2:19

Awesome. I mean, it is obvious, but what had you join in and write an article at this particular point? What called you?

Cindy Van Eeckhout 2:31

Yeah, what inspired me, of course, was the word joy and unlocking joy. And if you allow me, I'll tell maybe a little bit more about why joy is so important in my life and why I help others now to experience this. So I go back a little bit in time and tell you my story. I'll try to do it as fast as I can because I have quite some years to go back to. But originally I'm from Belgium, as I told you after studying and doing my studies in business engineering, I started to work in the corporate world, worked there for eight years, loved it, learned a lot. I was a sales manager, completely different thing. Had 10 people, and we work on the top 100 companies. But for me, the most important thing is that I met my husband there. And that was already the first joy in my life. No, I had other joys in different ways.

Garry Schleifer 3:27

Anyway, of course, but that was one of your main joys in life. I get it.

Cindy Van Eeckhout 3:30

It was a very big change in life, and after a certain time, we just said, like, okay, it's great here because we had great uh bosses and colleagues and everything, but we had this feeling like, is this what we want in life? And is this what really gives us the fulfillment that we still want? Because after a certain time, values were not aligned anymore, and again, I'm very grateful of the corporate world. But anyway, we took the decision after eight years to just quit the corporate world and to literally follow our heart, realize our dreams. And we came from Belgium all the way to the south of France, where we started our first business, and this is where joy comes in. Because in the meanwhile, we created, as you said already, four different businesses. I just go through them, and they all start with the word Allegria. And Allegria is a Spanish word for joy of life. So it started in 2003 with Allegria and joy of life, and with that, so from the joy of life, we opened a BNB with the name Allegria BNB, and the idea was there of having especially corporate high achievers, entrepreneurs who are always in this pressure, let them experience more joy in their lives. So, this was the first one joy of life. Then 10 years later, 10 years later, we had Allegria Art Boutique, and it's all about what I'm passionate about about decoration, art, jewelry, and things like that. And this was for us the joy of giving. So we had the joy of life, the joy of giving, and everything went well until 2020 when COVID hit.

Garry Schleifer 5:08

Oh no, right, no Airbnbs.

Cindy Van Eeckhout 5:11

Everything stopped. So, no more clients, no more revenues, no more work. They forced us to stop working, and we're like, oh my gosh, what are we going to do? So, this is when we created a third company, and that is Allegria Real Estate. And this is for us the joy of living, and living not just finding and helping people finding a house, but really like a home and helping them also guiding them through with lots of different things. So, this was number three, the joy of living. And with that, in 2022, we were having three companies, we were thriving with the three of them because borders were open again, BNB was running well, it was the best year ever, the same with the art boutique, the same with real estate. But then there was another thing we just realized like, oh my gosh, we were completely exhausted because we had so many things to do, and this is where we realized like joy, which is like the most important value for us, it was completely missing. And this is what inspired me then with my husband to take a bold decision to stop two of the three companies. So we stopped the BNB and the art boutique after 20 years, so it was quite emotional in one hand side, and we said, let's move on to a new chapter. We kept the real estate. I said something else will come on our path, and then four days later, it all started with everything around coaching and personal development, and I loved it so much. And I realized that I've been coaching people from all my life as I was a sales manager, also with all the guests. We were talking so much with people, listening to them, asking questions, inspiring them, and so I started to study again, and I started to study everything concerning mindset, concerning well-being, health, neuroscience, finance, spirituality, whatever it was. But anyway, having that said, we created the fourth and the last company, Allegria Coaching.

Garry Schleifer 7:16

Last, yeah, you're still breathing.

Cindy Van Eeckhout 7:18

But for today, for today, right, there we go. So this is the story. It ends with Allegria Coaching, and this is like for me the joy of being. And for me, this is one of the most special ones because it makes a full circle, and this is where today I empower high-achieving women to eliminate also overwhelm caused by misaligned success so they can lead with more clarity, energy, health, and joy. And so, what I want to do with the article, with this podcast here, it's it's just like creating a ripple effect of joy that I believe can transform the world around us.

Garry Schleifer 7:54

Yeah, wow.

Cindy Van Eeckhout 7:56

Is this an answer to your question?

Garry Schleifer 7:58

Yeah, and what a great story. You know what? I'm gonna add a little layer to that. One of my favorite songs is called Allegria, and it's Cirque de Soleil. And that was their their album. And I'm getting chills hearing you talk about Allegia because I just I can hear it singing and playing in my head. It's fantastic, and now I didn't stop to think what it meant.

Cindy Van Eeckhout 8:24

You never knew it was joy of life? No, now you know.

Garry Schleifer 8:28

Well, maybe maybe not up here, but maybe in my heart.

Cindy Van Eeckhout 8:32

You knew it, but you didn't know you knew it.

Why She Coaches High-Achieving Women

Garry Schleifer 8:34

Because it so resonated, so resonated with me. Cindy, one of the questions is so what had you focus on women entrepreneurs or high-achieving women?

Cindy Van Eeckhout 8:47

I like women, I like men. It's not that there is a but it's just like I think with the journey I had going from corporate, going for a four-times entrepreneur, I attract more women than men. So I made it like a decision. And I do think that things are sometimes different even though the worlds are the same in the corporate world and the entrepreneurship world are the same for men and for women, but there are some extra layers. For instance, when I say like all these companies, these are I see them like babies that we had, but we have also two real babies, and they're grown up now, they're two sons of 18 and 20. And having not only ambition as a woman, but also having a partner, having kids, and having friends and family, and trying as a woman to combine all these different heads. I do believe it's a little bit more challenging for women today than for men, even though I know there are some, not some, but a lot of amazing men as well, who try to help. But if you go higher up in the corporate level, I see there is a difference, and I see there is more stress and overwhelm true for these high-achieving women, and also this is to support them even more.

Garry Schleifer 10:08

Maybe that's well, and I mean it's kind of a rhetorical question because we all know it's an uneven playing field for for men and women in the same fields, same areas. They have to they show up with that field, they have to show up more. Super women complex, the whole super mom complex, all of that. So I truly get it, and thank you for the supporting them and and sharing your own experience and showing them what's available to them. And what are you finding is that how does joy disappear for those women as success increases?

Cindy Van Eeckhout 10:47

Well, it it disappears in general, because when in general joy disappears because success for me it rewards the result and not the alignment. And it is, I think, so important because when your success is growing for everybody, your pressure and your responsibilities are growing. And when they're growing, high achievers, men and women, they tend to minimize their emotions to become more productive. But if you do that and you minimize your emotions, at a certain time you will just be disconnected from your energy, from your values and your needs. And this is when joy becomes one of the first things that is sacrificed in the name of performance. And when you have like these suppressed emotions and like unprocessed stress or burnout or well doubt or whatever, this leads to burnout. Yeah, and and I also see a lot that over time success becomes then something that they manage rather than something that nourishes them. And this is why, unfortunately, joy disappears.

Garry Schleifer 12:08

Disappears. I want to mention to those shout out to you from your article for those that haven't read it yet, and please go read it. Four areas mental overload, emotional suppression, physical depletion, and spiritual misalignment. And so we're just talking about kind of covering those topics very lightly. But how do we get from that misalignment to alignment?

Cindy Van Eeckhout 12:37

That's also interesting to see and to hear and to talk about. So when we talk about misalignment and misaligned success, what I mean is like it is misaligned when success it looks great from the outside, yeah, but it doesn't feel good from the inside. So on paper it's all great. And even if you're doing uh everything correctly, if you are not aligned, so this is what I say with the missile, if you are not aligned, your energy will be drained, your nervous system will be overloaded, and you will be overwhelmed. And joy at that moment becomes like more uh optional instead of essential. And also there today in society, society applauds more again the results, but not the cost, and it is costing quite a lot if you have this misaligned success. So you can be successful, but if you want sustainable success, you do have to make sure that it's aligned with your values, your needs. And do know that we all change in life. So what can feel aligned today maybe isn't anymore 10 years later or two years later, whatever, and that's fine. So don't be too hard on yourself and just accept what I liked it then, but there's something in me just doesn't feel aligned. That's fine, it's just that you are changing, you are evolving, and it's time for a new chapter.

Garry Schleifer 14:06

Just like you told in your story, Belgium, then Airbnb, no longer Airbnb and art studio. Next, next, next. Just keep looking and being open and self-aware. And as we all know, coaching helps with that. I couldn't help Cindy but think of the word happiness when you talked about success. Although you had success in both categories for me, happiness, uh happiness and joy. And I'm gonna quote something that you said. While happiness is often externally driven, in other words, a response to pleasurable circumstances, joy is intrinsic, it's deeper, more stable, uh it's a deeper, more stable emotional state, an internal yes to life. So yeah.

Cindy Van Eeckhout 14:56

But it's exactly that. For me, joy it's a way of being, and happiness is a way of feeling, yeah, and the way of being, it's like this this renewable source of vitality that's inside of us and it's internal. And the happiness is more like for me an emotional reaction to an external event. And they're both of them are nice, but the joy goes deeper. It's it comes from your soul, they're where the happiness is comes from emotion and it's from something external. But if you can combine both, not against it, they're both very well.

The Five Pillars Of Joy

Garry Schleifer 15:31

Yeah, exactly, right? What I love is that it's it's not mutually exclusive, it's not success is happiness or success is joy. They can be both, remembering that happiness is fleeting and joy is intrinsic. So that's kind of the goal. And it's and it's it's funny, Cindy, because when I first started thinking about this, I was thinking, oh, this is gonna be such a woo-woo topic. But I've since received the articles, published the issue, and talked to so many of you great authors, and it's scientifically proven and performance proven, and just like all of these. So it's just it's very much something that I'm hoping that choice help bring to the forefront is something that's a very important aspect of coaching. And what I would like to hear more about is you talk about your five pillars of your joy of life method. You want to speak a little bit about that?

Cindy Van Eeckhout 16:26

Of course, with lots of pleasure. How long do we have? Do we have a couple of hours?

Garry Schleifer 16:32

A couple of hours, yeah, exactly. That's the problem with podcasts. I could go on for hours, and so let's give you about five or so minutes.

Cindy Van Eeckhout 16:42

I'm fine with that. Okay, short version. When we talk about my joy of life method, it's something I created when I had my breakdown a little bit when uh we we were so exhausted in 2022. And um, it is like a structured sustainable way to realign your success. So there are five pillars. Pillar number one, it's all about clarity, and this clarity comes down to what is truly important for you. So, what matters most to you, and to see that whatever you want to accomplish, that it's aligned with what is the most important for you. That's pillar number one. Pillar number two, it's all about self-care and energy management. And when I talk about self-care, it is like creating a ritual. And I talk in the article also about my morning joy activation ritual. So for the listeners, they can read it in the magazine as well. But there are some ingredients, and I'm just gonna note them because they're so important. It's when you have a ritual, the ingredients that are so important to have self-care, and self-care is there in order to get more energy, to prime your day with energy. And so if you combine breeding, and even if it's just one minute of breathing, and the breathing will really regulate your nervous system, you combine it with some meditation, whatever kind of meditation. There's so many meditations on the on on the internet. There can be silence, they can be guided, you can do walk meditation, whatever you want to do that is aligned with you. This will help you to clear your mental clutter, and then you add some movement. And if you add some movement, this is like to reconnect back into your body, and uh, and then I always end with like a gratitude and intention setting. Now, when you have the gratitude for me, and this is a topic that is very important. The gratitude for me, it's just write down three or five things that you're grateful for. Because what I think, Garry, is for me, gratitude is so powerful because you can't be like angry and grateful at the same time, right? You can't be fearful and grateful. So for me, gratefulness it switches you from being um focusing on what is missing instead of and going to what is meaningful. And this for me changes everything, it's so powerful, and it's really it primes your emotional energy and it primes your day for success together with some intention. So, anyway, we started with clarity, we go on with the energy boosting, with self-care and a morning ritual, whatever the ritual is that you like. And from there on, number three, it's working smarter, not harder. And this is all about productivity and not busyness. And when I talk about and I help my clients with this pillar, this is getting crystal clear about your priorities. I talk about it in the article as well, making sure what is crucial, what is urgent, what is important, put out your top priorities and then just do it. Do delegate, dump.

Garry Schleifer 19:52

Oh automate, eliminate, delegate. I have my own version.

Cindy Van Eeckhout 19:57

Yeah, and when you do that, and then of course you have to plan intentional because it's great to think it, but you have to plan it and to track it. And then with that, you will reclaim time. And the most important thing here, it's not to reclaim time to work even harder. That's not the thing. It's to reclaim time to do the things you love. So, apart from the self-care and the morning return, the things you love with your family, with your friends, with whomever you want. And this is number three. Number four, it's all about your mindset. And we all know that 80% in life, it's all about the mindset, 20% is only skills. So when we talk about mindset, it's about growth mindset, it's about overcoming perfectionism and limiting beliefs, it's about turning challenges into opportunities, celebrating wins, and most important, learnings, because this is where the goal is. And then the can I, the constant and never-ending improvement. And with that, that your mindset is ready when a challenge is coming and that you are able to be adaptable. And then the fifth one that's the last pillar, it's all about your purpose and your meaning. And this is just about really seeing that your daily actions are aligned with your values, and then everything comes back together. And this is how you realign your success and how you can have sustainable success and also joy in your business and in your life. This is the five minutes.

Garry Schleifer 21:23

Five pillars. Thank you very much. Very succinct and almost straight on top. But no, I'm just kidding. We could have gone. I don't know.

Cindy Van Eeckhout 21:31

I wasn't watching the client.

Gratitude And Celebrating Small Wins

Garry Schleifer 21:33

Well, and one of the, you know, a couple things I heard in there. I have a client and they're also a subscriber to choice even though not a coach. And they heard one of the podcasts and they started a gratitude jar in the office. And so she asks them to come when they come in, what are you grateful for? Write it on a little slip of paper and put it in a gratitude jar. So they are starting to share that in the office, and apparently about 10 other people started doing that in respective locations as well. So I thought that was really cool.

Cindy Van Eeckhout 22:09

But it's a it's a beautiful initiative, and I suppose at the end of the year they open a jar and and they read it. I don't know.

Garry Schleifer 22:16

I don't know. I meet with a friend of mine and we do celebrations, and I keep track of them all on a Google Doc. And now is the time of year where I want to go back and reflect on all of them and remind myself and fill my heart with those things that I'm grateful for, that I that had purpose and meaning enough to be celebrated as an accomplishment.

Cindy Van Eeckhout 22:39

It is so beautiful. I also have a beautiful journal, gratitude journal. And what you're telling, and and I want to share this with your audience that we underestimate not only gratitude, but to celebrate the small wins, because in general, our mind is more wired to look at the things that we didn't do, the things that didn't went well. And when you're in like a mindset that is not so positive, just taking your gratitude journal and your win journal or what you're having, your Google Sheet, whatever, and just reading it then, it fills you with so much joy and positive energy, and it's so important, it shifts immediately again. Like, okay, whoa, it's not that I'm not doing the right things or whatever. I did so many great things. Wow, but now I'm just in a week or a day that it's not my day today, and that's fine. But I did so many other things, so celebrating this and also celebrating the learnings, this is also so key in life.

Garry Schleifer 23:42

Yeah, oh no kidding very much. Another ritual celebration. Uh you have me remember that my sister-in-law has um every year for each of her sons' birthday, there's always a gathering at her house for their their children's birthday, and they're now in their 20s, and we still get together at their home for that. And it's their in-laws and and us and the whole bit, so it's fantastic. Um, uh one thing I want to, I guess, say thank you and and find out a little bit more about is thank you for talking about smarter, not harder, and reconnecting with purpose and meaning. And why I say that is because one of the things I've noticed with my coaching clients is that you can get them working smarter, not harder, but they have so much stuff to do that it as soon as they get that handled, then like you said, they just add more work. To connect them with purpose and meaning has them do things outside of work that will say, because we can fill time, right? You give give us a day, give us a whole day and nothing to do outside of work, and we'll just possibly work. So, what I love to do is connect as you do between purpose and meaning and letting go of work and what's most important and all those things you said. So, thank you for that reminder, is I guess what I'm saying.

Cindy Van Eeckhout 25:10

You're welcome.

Garry Schleifer 25:11

Yeah. Reminder to our audience that these are all in this fabulous article, including some reflective coaching questions around joy. I'll give you an example. Where in your life are you most out of alignment with your energy or values? Just like Cindy spoke about in her story about how she got to where she is today with her entrepreneurship number four. She's still cooking. I can tell it's not gonna be the last one.

Cindy Van Eeckhout 25:46

Yeah, but there are always things going on and lots of beautiful new initiatives. And I'd love this year also to to launch my own podcast concerning all this. So but it will stay for the moment in the same company. It's a different project, but in the same company. But I stay open to everything and I do believe, and I believe in myself, I believe in my intuition, and my intuition will tell me if it's something I will do for 10 years, 20 years, 30 years, whatever, or if the time is ready to go to a new chapter. And I do like within Allegria Coaching what I'm doing today, it gives me so much satisfaction helping and serving others with all the experiences I have, and then on the other hand, hand, you can do so many different things with it. Like I said, it's having an own uh own podcast. I'm writing for the moment a book as well. So in my spare time because I work smart and not hard, so I have some extra time, and this is the time to write a book because it's great to share your experiences. So lots of things going on, and this is what I really, really hope that your listeners also feel like everything is possible in every area of life. We're talking about business, but it's the same with relationship, it's the same with your health, it's the same with emotions, with everything with your spirituality, whatever feels right for you. If you want to focus on it and you put energy and joy into it and you do it with your heart, yeah, everything is possible.

Garry Schleifer 27:24

Well, that's how I'm still here, and choice is almost 25 years old. So, and I've been coaching officially for a week over 25 years. So a week ago, a week ago was 25 years.

Cindy Van Eeckhout 27:39

So big celebration, I suppose. Exactly.

Garry Schleifer 27:43

Exactly. I'd like to leave our listeners with a quote from Cindy's excellent article as coaches, we don't need to fix our clients, we need to help them reconnect to their energy, their truth, their spark. Because when a client reclaims their joy, they don't just feel better, they lead better, they live better, and the rem they remind the world what's possible.

Cindy Van Eeckhout 28:08

Beautiful.

Garry Schleifer 28:09

It is if you do say so yourself.

Cindy Van Eeckhout 28:13

You say you say it's so beautiful. And it sounds differently if I hear it from you, Garry.

Garry Schleifer 28:18

Isn't it always different when somebody else reads things that like that? Cindy, what else would you like us our audience to do as a result of this article and uh this conversation?

Cindy Van Eeckhout 28:31

I like the audience to do maybe two things. The first one is a very small little step. It's just ask yourself what is one thing that will bring me joy today. Close your eyes and ask yourself that. And you can even add it in your morning ritual because while you will focus on that, you will say, like, what is bringing me joy? And and I had some clients when I asked that question, it's like I don't know. Because they were so disconnected from their joy. So ask yourself that, and whatever the answer is, just make it happen.

Garry Schleifer 29:10

Right, follow it.

Simple Joy Practice And Free Quiz

Cindy Van Eeckhout 29:12

That's the one thing, and then the other thing, if there are listeners that are in a season where things are more challenging. I'm very pleased to offer also a free gift to your audience. And it is my joy for life assessment. And a joy of life assessment, it's like a free two-minute quiz with 10 questions. But the nice part is you will get to know and identify what is giving you all the stress, the overwhelming exhaustion, and you will receive personalized tips and practical insights so that you can regain your alignment again, and so that you have your clarity, your energy, and your joy without sacrificing your success. So I suppose you will put it in the box below this podcast. Yeah, so this is for all the listeners, and it's really very practical, and you get a real report just by answering 10 questions.

Garry Schleifer 30:07

Wow, thank you so much. That's very generous and very helpful. Yeah, it's starting two minutes, that's all it takes, people. Say no to one thing, and you can maybe fit this in. Work smarter, not harder. What's the best way to reach you, Cindy?

Cindy Van Eeckhout 30:23

The best way is my website in one hand side. It's Alegria coaching.eu. So Alegria with one L. You think about the song, Alegria. coaching and then .eu, because I'm still living in the south of France. And I'm also active on LinkedIn under my name, Cindy Van Eeckhort.

Garry Schleifer 30:43

Okay, thank you, Cindy. And thank you so much for joining us for this Beyond the Page episode.

Cindy Van Eeckhout 30:48

And thank you for this beautiful conversation, Garry. It was really nice. Thank you so much.

Garry Schleifer 30:53

You're welcome. That's it for this episode of Beyond the Page. For more episodes, subscribe via your favorite podcast app, most likely the one that got you here in the first place. If you're not a subscriber at choice Magazine and you're watching this podcast, you can sign up for your free digital issue by scanning the QR code in the top right hand corner of my screen. If you're listen only mode and when you're safely at home, go to choice- online.com and click the sign up now button. I'm Garry Schleifer. Enjoy the journey of mastery.